Monday, January 10, 2011



 Date: January 10th, 2011

RE: Pew Riders Club Fare Changes

Dear Pew Riders;

We would like to take this moment to express our appreciation to those of you who utilize our Pew Riders Club services. We realize that without you, there would be no such thing as a Pew Riding Club, and we recognize that fact. So with that being said, "Thank You!"

However, we felt it necessary to inform you of some changes to our Pew Riders Club. Due to recent changes (and by recent, we mean over 2,000 years ago) made by our Management (and by management, we mean Jesus) at an important meeting (and by meeting, we mean the Sermon on the Mount), we are now required (as we always have been) to request a surcharge in order to gain the maximum benefits of our pews.

Beginning now, we would like to inform you that all members of our Pew Riders Club will be asked to pay a small club membership fee of evangelizing the world. We accept the following forms of payment;

Inviting your neighbors to services
Visiting the sick and elderly
Preparing communion
Cleaning the Building
Teaching a Bible class
Volunteering to organize functions
And a host of other options!

If you have any questions regarding any of our easy (and by easy, we mean required by Christ) payment options, please don't hesitate to contact our easily accessible billing dept (and by billing department, we mean our elders, deacons, or minister).

For further information, please reference the following Administrative Forms and Procedures

Club Requirements Form Matthew 28:19
Club Requirements Form Mathew 25:31-46

Thank you,

The Billing Department

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